Now that interest only mortgages are becoming all the rage, mortgage companies have decided on a new type of mortgage. To qualify you must have two children who each agree to have two children of their own. These children and grandchildren would then assume the debt of your mortgage. Instead of a pyramid scheme which would involve unknowns, this plan keeps it in the family.

Under this new mortgage, called the FGP (Future Generation’s Problem) Mortgage, you do not have to make any payments whatsoever. Interest acrues for your children and grandchildren to pay. With this new option, you can afford to buy the 2-3 million dollar home, safe and secure in the fact that you can live out your remaining years in style, while pushing the 10-15 million dollar pricetag onto your children and grandchildren.

Fresh newlywed Stan Fielding is quoted as saying:

Finally, I’m getting what I’ve deserved since I moved out of my parents basement at the age of 32. If my wife and I can get twins, we’ll be on easy street.