Today is being called “Cyber Monday“, the day when, apparently, instead of fighting the malls, everyone uses time at work to visit Amazon.com and Walmart.com. It’s sometimes called Black Monday, as if for the holiday shopping season the stars align and cast the Earth into the shadow of a solar eclipse.

While I applaud anything that keeps people off the streets and out of my way, I question the logic of shopping online. It’s way too easily to get distracted. First you do search for icelandic thermal socks, and then Google calls you and idiot, because you should be searching for iceland thermal socks. On this page of search results you see a link to an Irish Times article. Fondly, you recall last March, how you were the hit of the bar while drinking green beer and hitting on the ladies (when in reality you were passed out on a table while a waitress named Hilga was slapping you around trying to wake you up). You decide to read the article, which is all about staying warm.

After this, you realize that it’s 11:30pm, time for lunch. Another successful morning behind you.